Thursday, 20 February 2014


Horoscope!!!!

Scorpio

Next week on this same day

your stars will be sucked into a black hole

leaving you with no thumbs or big toes.

If you do not wish this to happen

sleep in a potato sack with your toes facing

where the Scorpio stars should have been.

Matilda

 

Sorpio Horoscope 21/02/14


Beware your stars have merged with the darkness behind them. You should lie in bed all day, or face the harm and amnesia heding your way.

Written,published and edited by Cameron.

Wednesday, 19 February 2014

star sign


This is your day the stars have aligned.Later today you are going to make a break through and be a billionaire.Whatever you do turn up to work,also be aware as you will get chased by women I recommend you get in a car straight away.

Gemini star sign

Be aware Jupiter will get aligned with Mercury on Tuesday. To avoid losing your shoes, wear odd socks and yellow clothes, because Wednesday might not be as good as you planned.

by Alisha

If your star sign is Scorpio...

Scorpio

Be wary of those around you today. Do not let the arrows of betrayal and harsh feelings penetrate your shell. Disaster may await, you may have to veer to the side of your typical routine. Wear two socks on one foot, if it makes you feel better.

Written, edited and published to this website by Daniel

Aquarius horoscope

Today is your day. Your element will flare, the sun will arise, you will float in the air. Your planets have changed so beware where you step, not everyone's safe so make sure you take care. Because  bullets can harm so make sure your aware when they pierce through  the air like unkind words of displeasure.



by Joel Nicholls

Sunday, 1 December 2013

The Dark Side of Mrs Stretch

An angry lady wrapped in chocolate clothing storms into the room. She gives the area, and its inhabitants, a glare that would freeze the toes off a polar bear. Masses of make-up create a veil that makes her face unrecognisable. Her purple convex glasses lower as her wrinkly face scowls in unattractive disgust. Coldly, she brushes back a loose strand of her blonde hair, without ever once releasing the deadlock stare that emits from her two emerald eyes. In a ranting fury, she stomps her left foot down with such force the floorboards below creak in protest. "SIT DOWN!" she roars in a berating tone that seems to hold all the authority of fate itself.

Well, I'll chew ma own head off, it's Mrs Stretch!